What is Listening to Students?

Listening to Students is a collection of 30 anonymous writings by mostly teenagers who used the Wonder Anew questions to face a personal difficulty.

It is also a collection of 30 feeling portraits.

Are they portraits of the students?

Not actual portraits.

They are feeling portraits.

Which means that the portraits visually represent an aspect of the difficulty described, the uncomfortable feelings and thoughts inherent in problems that become invaluable when we are courageous enough to look and wrestle with them for insight.

I was curious to see how an artist might represent and invite us to embrace tough feelings in a beautiful, tender way.

Why are you sharing the student writings?

I was intrigued and inspired by what the students stated as their difficulties, their willingness to explore, and what they felt and thought about their experiences. I thought you would be, too.

I find it beneficial when others are willing to share how they are working with challenges.

How did you get these writings?

I go to schools. The May 1 - 30 student writings were written 2.5 to 3 years ago.

I use this lesson.

(I also work with university students and other organizations with adult or young adult groups. Here is a list of other explored difficulties.)

Is there anything you say or do when you use the lesson?

I begin with an introduction to meditation and then we spend time being quiet and still, and after that, we talk about what we noticed in ourselves.

I tell them something that I wished I’d been told at their age:

• That difficulty and discomfort are part of life. We all have problems.
• That recognizing and exploring a difficulty is a huge step to unraveling a problem, and ultimately a way to connect with others.
• That the difficulty isn’t the problem. The problem is how to work with it.

I tell them that I began using the 8 Wonder Anew open-ended questions when my son died unexpectedly and learned something that changed my life: a difficulty is a challenge with a choice, a freeing choice. In this mess, there is something I can learn.

I invite students to unravel a personal problem as a curious investigator. I emphasize that taking an attitude of kindness while doing this investigative work is a supra-key in this activity. I tell them that there is nothing that we can experience and feel that is not worthy of our kindness and attention. Together we begin our adventurous experiment.

Why do you think they write openly?

My thought is trust. They trust their teacher. The teacher trusts me. It matters that their writings remain anonymous. I reassure confidentiality—that no one, including their teacher, will know who wrote what.

Who listens to what they write?

Besides listening to themselves? Well, you do, by reading.